Grandma and Grandpa's 48 hours

So, I left Utah on Saturday.  Grandma and Grandpa followed, and actually landed before I did.  We drove home from the airport and hung out that night.  We had Sunday and part of Monday before they had to leave again.  So, we had 48 hours to cram in as much love, visiting, and fun as possible.  

Grandma, who used to teach piano lessons, helped the girls with their books and songs a little bit.

Because we visited to the late hours, there were naps, and much cuddling to be done too.

Grandma was also nice enough to share some of the contents of her purse.

And the girls thought it was super fun!

Sunday was the baptism.  Monday we woke up and made sure everything was packed up.  We spent lunch time at Chick Fil A so the kids could play at a park even though it was super hot outside.  And then Grandma and Grandpa had to go get back on a plane.  My sister, who had refused to have her child while I was there, had an induction date.  And they were watching her other children while she was at the hospital.  They left Pickle here for the week though, and that was great fun!

Kaitlyn's Baptism

The whole time that I was in Utah, my children were in Virginia.  Having fun and most likely swimming every day.  And hubby was working at the job site down in Florida.  The plan was once I flew into the airport on Saturday, I would take my inlaw's car, drive up north, and trade vehicles (one with children, one without) and turn around and drive back home.  The main problem with this plan is that I wouldn't be able to leave ATL until after I had landed, gotten my bags, and found the car in the sea of long term parking.  Which meant I would probably not leave until 5pm, drive 4 hours north, and then have to drive home.  Long time.  Thankfully, hubby is a smart man, and came up with another plan.  It is a slightly shorter distance from FL to VA than it is from AL to VA.  So, he would leave the job site and pick up the kids on Friday, and wait for us to get home on Saturday.  And I could come straight home, instead of driving north then south.  It meant we couldn't trade cars, but we could figure out a time to do that.  The truck fit all 6 of us, and the car fit the 5 of us that were usually together during the day.  

Saturday was spent mostly in the air.  My BIL was kind enough to drop us off at the airport at 5am.  Pickle left 45 min before I did, and I left about an hour before my parents did.  My sister and I had layovers, but in different airports, and my parents went straight through.  So, even though they left last, they landed first.  Weird.  I know.  Mom and dad rented a car, and left, but Pickle waited for me, and kept me company on the way home.  We picked up pizza for dinner and then, once the children were showered and in bed, I went to the grocery store to pick up food.  After being gone for 2 weeks, there wasn't much left.  ;)

Sunday morning was regular church for us, and then we came home for a small nap before it was time to get ready for Kaitlyn's baptism!!!  In our church, we don't get baptized until we turn 8.  That way a) it is our choice, and b) we understand what we are doing, and how important it is for us and the covenants we make.

Kaitlyn was able to decide her program.  What songs to sing.  Who would give talks.  Who would say prayers.  And what treats we would eat afterwards.  She asked her aunt and grandpa to give talks, her brother and friend to give prayers, her grandma to play the piano and her sister to direct the music.  I suggested they practice together a little bit, and I love this picture :)

The talks were great.  I have gotten so many compliments on them!  The family was there.  And we had many friends from the ward as well.

There was a lovely spirit as well, and I'm so pleased Katilyn made a wonderful decision.

I told Kaitlyn that she could pick her own snacks afterwards.  And they didn't all have to be sweet.  So, she picked chocolate chip cookies, strawberries, doritos, cheetos and lemonade.  It sounds like a weird combination, but it was oddly tasty.

It was a wonderful day!

Grandma, Utah, day 4

Friday was my last day in Utah.  I made sure to visit my other Grandparents (mom's side) in the morning and then spent some time at Deseret Book with my mom.  It seems silly, but I don't get the opportunity to go to a specifically Mormon Christian bookstore very often, and we walked around for hours!  Then we stopped by downtown to pick up my Dad from work.  Thankfully, the headquarters for his company are located in SLC, so, even though he was away from home for several weeks, he didn't have to take vacation time that whole time.  He was still able to work some on the side :)  

We adjourned to my sister's house, where she fed us all dinner, and then we piled into the car to go visiting one last time.  Thankfully, through all her memory issues, Grandma always recognized her husband and children.  She did better with the grandchildren that were near and visited, but she was always sweet, and loving, and willing to hug everyone.

Grandma and Grandpa lived in the basement of the house they built themselves umpteen years ago, with my Aunt and Uncle living in the main house upstairs to help when needed.  It was such a nice day, we sat outside.  It was a wonderful view and it was nice so the kids could play on the trampoline and toys.

Hi Anna!

Look!  It's Mr Potato Head!

DannyBoy was super nice and kept the kids entertained a large portion of the time.  His wife, being great with child, didn't exactly want to jump on the trampoline or run around the yard.

The thing about Grandma is, even though she has memory issues, she is still sharp as a tack!  My cousin Tim told us a funny story while we were folding programs at the viewing:  He said he was down in Grandpa's bedroom, visiting, and looking at the medals hanging on the wall.  Grandpa had won them in his slightly younger years while playing tennis.  Tim went down the row of medals and said "This one is for tennis.  And this one is for tennis.  And this one is for tennis.  And this one is for naked mud wrestling."  At which point, without missing a beat, Grandma said "That one is mine!"

That evening, when we arrived at the house, we knocked on the door.  My Aunt and Uncle were eating dinner, so we suggested we visit outside.  We walked with Grandma around back and sat down to visit.  Grandma, however, was worried that my aunt and uncle didn't know we were here (even though they had answered the door with her moments ago; she had forgotten).  She kept asking us to go knock on the door, and let them know we were here.  We tried several times, unsuccessfully, to change the subject, or tell her we already had.  Finally, my dad said "Do you want me to call them, and let them know we are here?"  He pulled his phone out of his pocket,  and put it to his ear, but didn't actually dial anything.  Again, Grandma being the smart lady she is, looked at him with her best mother look that said "I know you aren't doing what you say you are doing" and we all laughed out loud.  

Grandma kept saying that she thought it was slightly rude that my aunt and uncle didn't come out to visit with us.  My dad made the comment that they were probably tired of us because we had seen them all day yesterday.  Grandma asked what we did yesterday that we would have seen them all day.  We didn't want to tell her that it was at her husband's funeral, but dad broke the news to her, and she did ok with it that time.  We were still quick to distract her with other things.

It really was a pleasant visit.  My aunt and uncle did eventually come out to talk with us, and we stayed until it was fairly late in the evening.

It was just nice to sit and visit.

At one point, Grandma noticed that La was (obviously) quite pregnant, and asked if they had decided on a name yet.  My dad, being somewhat prone to sarcasm (a trait he got from Grandpa) said they were thinking about naming the baby "Mustafe."  Grandma is nice enough to not say anything, but you could tell she wasn't thrilled with the name.  My dad said "It's a nice name.  Don't you like it?"  Grandma, having been given permission to express her true feelings, didn't say anything.  But, she did make a face.  An awesome, full of dislike, face.  Which prompted my dad to laugh.  I love my dad's laugh.  And his huge smile.  It is rare to capture it on camera, but I am glad I did.

I made sure to get lots of  pictures of Grandma holding hands.  Specifically with Aunt Pickle (she has the fabulous glitter nails) and my dad.  Sorry about the weird brown smear thing.  I dunno what that is.

It was such a lovely night, but I was almost shivering by the time I left.  I was cold!  In the middle of July!!!  And, because we are weird, we headed to have a treat before we left the next day.  My sisters's husband's brothers (what does that make them?  My brother in law in laws?) have opened a  Hokulia shave (yes that is correct) ice shack, and we headed there for our treat.  We were already shivering, and we elected to have ice, but...  there you go.  It was huge!  I chose to cover mine in sweetened condensed milk, and it was delicious!  It was enormous, and I didn't finish it, but it was delicious!

After we shared blankets and ate our treat, we split up and went back to pack.  My sister, my parents and I were all leaving in the morning to fly back to Alabama.  Ironically, we were leaving on 3 different flights, and 3 different times.  Sigh.

Grandpa's Funeral, AKA Utah, day 3

Thursday morning, I woke up around 4:30 am UT time.  Of course.  Not only did I not have children, but I was 2 hours behind.  I could have slept in for hours!!!  But my body, once again, said "Nah."  I used some of that time to talk with hubby.  He was awake and getting ready for work, so we visited for a bit.  Then I got up and showered and ate breakfast.  There was a viewing for an hour before the funeral, and a prayer before we headed into the chapel.  I always feel weird being the "center of attention", and being in the processional was somewhat strange.  I know people aren't watching ME, but....  again, I suspect there was a small element of guilt involved, because I am not there and able to participate in as many family events as I would like.  The funeral was wonderful.  Each of his children participated, shared memories, and, ironically, made us laugh.  I think my favorite was when my Aunt A stepped up to say the closing prayer and surprised us all with a joke and memory.  It was a nice way to close.  And I only cried a few times!  Then, we picked up a bite to eat, and headed to the graveside.  Again, I felt like it was a small luxury to be able to go to the graveside.  It was 2 hours one direction, and had the children been there, I am not sure I would have been able to go.  But, it was a pleasant ride in the car with my siblings and parents.  I took a few pictures on the way out.

While I was in Utah, it rained every day I was there.  Which is fairly unusual.  Not only is it unusual for it to be raining in July, but there was thunder and lightening almost every day.  

The cemetery was a nice little place out in Scipio.  The mountain views were amazing.

The siblings elected to let the younger grandsons be pall bearers for Grandpa's coffin.  

They said it had nothing to do with ability, you see.  It was just about the honor ;)

My Uncle Davey dedicated the grave.

And then we were done.  There was visiting, and hugging but thankfully very few tears.  I think they had all be shed when the coffin had been closed, and the remembrances had been shared.

That's my dad and his oldest brother.  Do you think they look alike?

All the siblings.  Smiling on a hard day, but pulling together and pulling through.

Grandma made it to the funeral, but didn't feel up to the long drive or the graveside.  But I was so glad that she made it to the funeral and shook hands.  During the viewing on Wednesday night, I was touched that so many of my teenage (especially boy) cousins would go and sit next to Grandma and hold her hand.  I think that physical hold helps her feel more comfortable, especially when she can't always remember what is going on.  During the viewing early Thursday morning, I took the opportunity to sit next to her for a few minutes and hold her hand.  I watched her receive visitors and shake hands.  There were a few visitors that she especially remembered, and she would stand up for a hug.  But I only lasted a few minutes.  She made me cry more than anyone, and I didn't want to mess up my make up!  So, the third time she stood up to hug someone, I made sure she had a loved on on the other side, and took my leave.  

Thursday night, we grabbed some pizza on the way back to my sister's house, and most of us went to bed semi early.  It had been a long, tiring, emotional day, and I had been up since 4:30.

Anna and Baby Pending, AKA Utah, days 1 & 2

I left the house by 4:30 and drove myself to the airport.  This time, I didn't park in a hotel because I didn't want to add time to my morning.  I also was planning to leave directly from ATL to go north to pick up the kids, so I didn't want to add time on the back end either.  I arrived in Utah by noon, and visited with my family for lunch.  It was definitely weird not having children or responsibilities.  Whenever someone said "Lets go here" or "Do you want to do that?" I had to double think it.  I didn't have to worry about whether the kids could go, or whether it is nap time, or whether I would have to bring entertainment.  It was invigorating and peculiar at the same time.  

Monday evening I went over to visit with my Grandmother.  She is a sweet, lovely woman, who is unfortunately suffering from dementia.  So, sometimes she didn't remember that her husband of 65 years had passed.  It was horrible to remind her and watch her begin the grieving process over and over.  Most of the time we just tried to talk over it or change the subject.  I was able to visit with her for a few hours on Monday evening, and hug a few people who stopped by.  And she was as sweet as always.  

Tuesday morning I went out to visit my other grandparents.  Grandpa Paul seems to be doing quite well.  The whole family was able to come and visit with us as too.  My sister sat right next to me on the couch.  Did you know that she was pregnant?  And, I mean, like really pregnant.  Like, almost ready to pop.  But, the whole week I was out there, wouldn't you know that she decided NOT to have the baby!!!  My sister opted not to find out the gender of the baby, and they were still debating names, so they mostly called her belly "Baby Pending".  And while we were at my Grandparents, Anna was super cuddly, and I got a few pictures of her cuddling her mommy and Baby Pending.

One of my favorites :)

Cheese!

Anna can be somewhat shy, but I worked hard to win her over.  I was missing my own children, so I wouldn't have minded having some lap time with my nieces and nephew.

I mean, look at that profile!!!  Such a sweet one!

After we left my grandparents, I drove with my mom up to see their condo.  They found their retirement home before they moved to Chile, and have been renting it out.  As luck would have it, it was empty during their trip to UT, so they have been able to stay in their own house!  (Sans furniture, camping style)  We ate lunch, and then changed to head to my Grandfather's viewing.  It was the first time I had seen him, and he did look different.  There were physical differences (not eating tends to thin you out a bit :)  But he just wasn't smiling and speaking and full of life.  Obviously.

During the viewing, we had some special visitors: my friends parents from VA who are serving a mission in UT came, my grandparents from my other side were able to come for a few minutes, and a few General Authorities from my church came to express their condolences as well.  As much as it was a sad time, and a time of grieving, it was wonderful to see so much of my family at once.  And it was amazing to feel how much support came from all the love that was shared.  There was a private viewing for the family from 4-6 and then it was an open viewing from 6-8, so by the time we were done, we were all fairly hungry.  At my sister's request, we went out to dinner at Rubio's.  The service left something to be desired, but the food was pretty good :)  My BIL took the littles home some time during the viewing and put them to bed, and hubby and the kids were on the other side of the continent.  So, it was my mom, dad, 2 sisters and brother.  As we sat there at dinner, we tried to remember the last time it had been just the 6 of us.  And we honestly couldn't remember.  We were all in Chile last summer.  True it was without grandchildren, but spouses were there.  The best we could come up with was before I got married.  It had been a while :)

Saturday/Independence Day Weekend

Friday we celebrated Kaitlyn's birthday.  She was a princess for a day, and she loved it.  Saturday was Independence Day.  We spent the day over at Aunt K's new pool.  No lie.  8 hours.  With occasional breaks for sunscreen reapplication.  The kids swam and swam and swam and swam.  Which was fine with me.  We were leaving the next day, and I wanted them to get in as much swimming time as possible.  We dried off long enough to have a nice BBQ, using as much of aunt K's house as she had unpacked.  After lunch, Auntie K left the house.  She was singing with the Virginia Symphony at an Independence Day Celebration in Virginia Beach.  Originally, we had planned to go see her along with fireworks.  But, it looked like rain, and we just didn't feel up to walking miles to the boardwalk, and taking hours to get out of the parking lot.  In the end, we decided not to go. 

Pretty much the whole time that we had been in Virginia, I was in constant communication with my family.  Remember when we went out to UT in Feb?  It was because my grandparents were ailing, and we knew we didn't have much time left.  6 months ago, we had mostly been fearing for my mom's dad, Grandpa Paul.  However, my dad's dad, Grandpa Dave, had taken a somewhat sudden downward turn.  And in the last 5 months, he had continued to get worse.  By the month of June, he had gotten so bad that my dad flew back to the states 3 weeks sooner than he had originally planned.  He was concerned his time with his father might be over if he didn't hurry.  It turns out, that was a good choice.  Some times were better than others, but he was able to talk and visit with him a few more times before he basically slipped into a coma.  Knowing that the end was coming, Grandpa had signed paperwork for no extraordinary measures to be taken, so I am sure it was an extremely difficult thing for all of his children to sit around his bedside and watch as he got further and further from this world.  A week before he passed, he had a family conference, spoke with each child, made sure Grandma was taken care of, and then slipped into unresponsiveness the next day.  I knew most of this before we ever drove up to Virginia.  I dreaded every phone call, and at the same time, anxiously answered the phone every time it rang.

The ORIGINAL plan involved us driving on home on Sunday, my sister flying in on Monday, and my parents flying in on Wednesday.  By Saturday, it was clear we would need to rethink those plans.  Grandpa Dave had not had anything to eat or drink for several days.  Dad would not miss Grandpa's funeral (I wouldn't expect him to) and Auntie Pickle wouldn't want to miss it either.  And, even though I am far away, I wanted to find a way to get out there too.  Hubby had already taken time off work to go up to VA.  It was a busy time for him, and it was difficult enough for him to get the few days off already.  It would have been fairly difficult for him to get another week off either to come with me, or to watch the children.  Plus, buying 6 last minute plane tickets?  Fugeddaboutit!  We were trying to explore our options, and make some plans.  Saturday was marked with much swimming and many phone calls.  

Eventually, we figured things out.  My dad helped me find a plane ticket (as I didn't really have access to the internet by the pool) and we arranged with Nana and Pop to leave the kids up in Virginia.  By Saturday night, laundry was done and bags were packed.  Sunday morning, we had a wonderful breakfast to celebrate Pop's birthday.  Then, hubby and I left in a borrowed car (we left the van with the kids), and drove back home.  With only the two of us, it was a pleasant trip, and we made good time.  We ate at places that didn't include playgrounds or happy meals, and spent far less time in the bathroom.  We got home in time to unload the car, and relax on the couch for an hour before heading to bed.

Monday morning, hubby headed off to work as usual.  I didn't have children, a dog, or very many responsibilities for the day, so I slept in as much as possible.  Ironically, it wasn't very long :(  Sometimes, I think my body has a mean sense of humor.  I started making piles of clothes and toiletries.  Thankfully, that wasn't very hard, since some of that was already packed from the day/trip before.  But, somewhere before lunch, the dreaded phone call came.  Actually, it was a group message, but that doesn't matter.  Even though I had been dreading it, expecting it, and waiting for it for several days, of course it never gets any easier.  I let my inlaws know, who were watching the kids, and called to let hubby know.  Sweet man that he is, he came home for lunch, just to let me cry on his shoulder.  In one way, I felt incredibly guilty and bad that I hadn't been able to see him one last time, that I hadn't been able to spend any more time with him, knowing that my opportunities were becoming increasingly limited.  On the other hand, I was incredibly grateful we had flown out in February.  Grandpa was not at 100%, but he was able to visit and hug, laugh and talk.  And the kids had at least a few memories of Grandpa.  I don't know if I would have done anything different, had I known at the time it would be the last time I would see him.  But I am grateful for his hugs, his sense of humor, and his smile all the same.

Monday afternoon I went to wallyworld and picked up some travelling mags, and I may have gotten a candy bar or two, and finished packing my clothes and carry on.  I went to bed as early as I thought I could sleep because I had to leave the house the following morning at 4:30 to make my flight to Utah.  

Kaitlyn Turns 8!

Friday was Kaitlyn's Birthday.  Nana took Kaitlyn shopping in the morning, to let her pick out her own presents, and I stayed at home to make her cake.  She requested a combination of strawberry shortcake and regular cake, and this is what she got.

Happy Birthday to Kaitlyn!

Make a wish!

And then we opened presents.  Dylan and Kari brought up their presents from home, and her cousins were nice enough to give her gifts too.  She is spoiled!

The majority of my pictures have Kaitlyn not looking at me.  Kari brought her camera to take pictures of Kaitlyn, and apparently, she is more important than I am.  :) So, most of my pictures of Kaitlyn's birthday have Kaitlyn looking off to the side.

But I include these next pictures for the other kids in the frame.  Like Kelsey.

And Karley.

Lastly, we presented Kaitlyn with a Kindle.  Let me be clear: This Kindle does NOT belong to her.  Nor are the books on there specifically hers.  But, as it was her birthday, we allower her the opportunity to use it first.  It was actually a hand-me-down from Aunt Pickle.  And they love it :)  (Also, I love Karley posing for Kari on the side)

Kaitlyn is still as much a girly girl as she has always been.  She tends to be on the dramatic side.  And she is having a hard time deciding if she wants to be like Kari, or be her own person.  Which, as a middle child, is something I can tell you every middle child goes through.  She will find her way.  With her own side of fashionista to go with it.

Pool, Version VA

So Wednesday we hung out and swam a little bit.  Thursday we did the same thing.  Hubby and I did occasionally get into the pool, but, by far, the kids were the biggest users.

We started Dylan with his floaties, just for safety sake, but after the first several days, he didn't need them anymore.  Yay swimming lessons!

Oh look!  There is a picture of my middle child!  I DO love her!

They are floatie friends!

Pool Conference!

For the record, I am a tiny bit disappointed in Kaitlyn's suit.  The top has faded horribly, almost white by now.  But the bottom is still quite pink.  And remember, we have only had it for about 2 months!  She is still happy, so I suppose that is all that matters.

Hi Kelsey!

Oh Kelsey!  Grrrr!

Again, my children love to jump in.  I love the action shots of them!  And yes, Dylan does occasionally belly flop.

While in VA, some kind soul (I can't remember if it was her daddy, Pop, or Uncle Map) taught Kari how to do a proper jack knife.  Not only that, but how to "directionalize" the splash.  Please note who she is directing her splash at.  ME!!!!  Stinker.

My children also discovered goggles.  They seriously wore them all the time.  So much so, that after the first 2 days, they all complained their eyes/eyebrows hurt!  They had bruises!!!  But they kept wearing them.  All the time.

This is cousin Kelly.  Her mom said "Show Auntie Em your eyes" and this is what I got.  Aren't they beautiful!

Cousin Kelly wasn't super interested in getting in the pool, but she would play up on the stairs all day.

Before I put my camera away for the day, I asked the kids to line up and jump in for me.  Poor Karley jumped at a bit of an angle, and yes, Dylan landed on her a bit :(  I love that Kelsey is last, and that Kelly doesn't jump in at all.

So, after that, I asked them to jump in one at a time.  And there was much rejoicing in the land.

There were days (like Independence day) where they spent 7 hours in the pool.  All.  Day.  So, we occasionally had to make them all get out, dry off, eat some sustenance and reapply sunblock.  During those times, it was common for the adults to get in and swim around a bit, where they wouldn't get splashed or be required to hold any children.  We would set a timer before they could get back in.  And they would often circle, like buzzards.  Waiting for the exact moment they wouldn't have to be dry anymore.

It was glorious.